Public speaking: from nerves to confidence

Learn to speak in public: managing nerves, structuring a speech, storytelling, voice and body language, Q&A, improvising, a practice plan and a checklist.

A short toast at a wedding, a proposal at a mahalla meeting, a few words to parents at a school event, a report at a team meeting or a talk at a conference — almost everyone has to speak in front of other people at least a few times in their life. This article is not about slides; it is about the speech itself and the act of delivering it: how to handle nerves, how to structure what you say, how to adapt to your audience, how to use stories, how to work with your voice and body language, how to speak from cue cards, how to practise, how to handle questions, how to present online and what to do when you are asked to speak without warning. At the end you will find a fictional example, common mistakes, a two-week practice plan and a checklist. If you want to learn how to prepare slides, read our article on preparing a presentation — the two pieces complement each other.

Public speaking is not an inborn talent but one of the soft skills that grows with practice. Good speakers, too, once spoke with a shaky voice and never looked up from their notes.

Nerves are normal: manage them rather than fight them

A racing heart, sweaty palms and a trembling voice before a speech are natural and happen to almost everyone. The aim is not to get rid of nerves completely: a little tension keeps you alert and brings your speech to life. The aim is to manage them, so that you are in charge of your nerves rather than the other way round.

A simple breathing exercise

When nerves build up, your breathing speeds up. Deliberately slowing it down helps many people feel calmer. A simple technique is “four-count breathing”:

Sit or stand up straight and relax your shoulders.
Breathe in through your nose for 4 seconds.
Hold your breath for 4 seconds.
Breathe out slowly for 4 seconds.
Repeat 3–4 times.

If holding your breath feels uncomfortable, skip that step. If you feel dizzy, stop and breathe normally. This is not a treatment for any health problem, just a simple way to collect yourself before you speak. If nerves get in the way of everyday life, have a look at our article on managing stress and, if needed, talk to a specialist.

Preparation is the best calming tool

Much of the anxiety comes from uncertainty: “What if I forget what to say?”, “Who will be there?”, “What if the microphone doesn’t work?”. Close each uncertainty with preparation:

Know the first two sentences of your speech by heart — the opening is the hardest moment.
Look at the venue in advance: what the room is like, where you will stand, whether there is a microphone. If possible, say your speech out loud there once.
Before you speak, drink some water, avoid a heavy meal and arrive early.
Tell yourself “I’m prepared, and this matters” rather than “I’m nervous”.

Remember: the audience notices your nerves far less than you think. They are not waiting for you to make mistakes; they are waiting for something useful.

Know your audience

No single speech fits every occasion. Who you are speaking to shapes the length, the tone and the words.

A wedding or family celebration. Short, warm and personal. One or two sincere memories, a wish for the couple, thanks to the guests. Avoid long lectures and risky jokes.
A mahalla meeting. Clear and practical. People want an answer to “What’s in it for me, and what do you need from me?”. Plain words, an exact date and place, respectful forms of address.
A school event. If children and parents are in the room together, keep it short and lively and use examples children can follow too.
A team meeting. Main conclusion first, details afterwards. Respect your colleagues’ time. Our article on workplace communication explains in detail how to speak clearly and respectfully.
A conference or seminar. A more formal tone, evidence and sources, and strict respect for the time limit.

Before you speak, write down answers to three questions: who are these people? What do they already know about the topic? What should they do or remember after your speech?

Speech structure and storytelling

A speech with a clear structure is easy to follow and easy to remember. There is a simple template that works in many situations: an opening, three main points, a conclusion and a call to action.

The opening: grab attention

In the first minute, listeners decide whether to listen to you. You can start with “Hello, today I would like to talk about…”, but follow it straight away with something that catches their attention:

A question. “Which of you remembers the last time you read a book together with your child?”
A short story. “Last week our neighbours’ daughter came back from the library without finding the book she needed…”
A surprising but real fact. Only use information you have checked yourself and whose source is clear. Never make up numbers — one invented fact undermines trust in the whole speech.

Three main points

People do not remember much. Divide your speech into three main points and signpost them clearly: “First…”, “Second…”, “And finally…”. Support each point with one example or piece of evidence. If a fourth or fifth point appears, drop the weakest.

Conclusion and call to action

At the end, repeat your main points in a sentence or two and say plainly what you expect from your listeners: “Come to the school yard on Saturday at ten in the morning”, “Let’s put this proposal to a vote at the next meeting”. A speech without a call to action is like a pleasant chat: nice to hear, but it changes nothing.

Storytelling

We quickly forget a list but remember a story for a long time. A simple story has four parts:

The hero — a real person (yourself, your student, your neighbour; do not share personal details without permission).
The problem — what they faced.
The action — what they did or what help they received.
The result and the lesson — what changed and what it means for your listeners.

Keep the story short — no more than a minute — and always tie it to your main point.

Voice and body language

Your audience takes in not only your words but also how you say them.

Voice

Pace. Nerves make people speed up. Speak a little more slowly than usual, especially in key sentences.
Pauses. Pause for two or three seconds before and after an important point. A pause lets you breathe and gives listeners time to think. Do not be afraid of silence.
Volume. The person in the back row should be able to hear you. If there is a microphone, keep it at the same distance from your mouth.
Intonation. A monotone is tiring. Ask questions with a questioning tone and stress the important word.
“Um”, “er”, “like”. Filler words usually appear while we are thinking. You do not need to eliminate them completely, but you can reduce them: record yourself on your phone, find out which word you use most and train yourself to replace it with a short pause.

Body language

Stance. Stand with your weight evenly on both feet, feet shoulder-width apart. Do not sway or keep shifting your weight from one foot to the other.
Hands. Do not put your hands in your pockets or fold your arms across your chest. It is enough to keep them loosely at waist height and use natural gestures that match what you are saying. Holding cue cards also helps keep your hands calm.
Eye contact. Look at individual people rather than the room as a whole: say one point to one person and the next to someone in another part of the room. That way everyone feels you are speaking to them.
Movement. Do not wander back and forth for no reason. Taking a step or two as you move to a new point, however, looks natural.

Do not read a script: cue cards and practice

Why reading a written script does not work well

If you read a fully written text, your eyes stay on the paper, your voice becomes flat and you lose contact with your listeners. Memorising the text word for word is risky too: forget one word and the whole chain breaks.

Working with cue cards

A better approach is small cue cards (thick paper, roughly the size of your palm):

First write the speech out in full — this puts your thoughts in order.
Then prepare one card for each part: the opening, the three main points and the conclusion.
On each card, write only key words, one example and a linking sentence, in large letters.
Number the cards — if you drop them, you can quickly put them back in order.
Write out in full only exact figures, dates, names and quotations — it matters that you get them right.

How to practise

In front of a mirror — to watch your body language and facial expressions.
By recording yourself on your phone — to hear your voice, pace and filler words. Also watch the video with the sound off and pay attention only to your movements.
In front of a friend or family member — ask them, “Which point stuck with you? Where was it unclear?”
With a timer — aim for a little less than the time you are given. If you have five minutes, try to finish in about four.

After each practice session, improve one thing. Trying to fix everything at once is exhausting.

Q&A, speaking online and improvising

The question-and-answer session

Anticipate the questions and prepare short answers. Listen to each question to the end, briefly repeat it if necessary and then answer. If you do not know the answer, do not make one up — an honest reply builds trust. Useful phrases:

“That’s a good question. I don’t have the exact figures with me, but I’ll check and get back to you."
"That’s outside my area, but I can tell you who would be able to answer."
"Just to make sure I understand: are you asking about …?”

For events held in Uzbek:

“Yaxshi savol. Bu haqda aniq ma’lumotim yo’q, tekshirib, ertaga sizga xabar beraman."
"Bu mening sohamdan tashqarida, lekin kim javob bera olishini aytishim mumkin."
"To’g’ri tushundimmi: siz … haqida so’rayapsizmi?”

To feel more confident speaking English, use the phrase bank in our article on speaking English.

Speaking online

When you speak online, the camera takes the place of the room. Look at the camera rather than at the faces on the screen, so your listeners feel you are looking at them. Test your microphone in advance, make sure light falls on your face from the front and switch off unnecessary notifications. Energy comes across less strongly on a screen, so make your voice and facial expressions a little livelier than usual. Our article on the video interview explains in detail how to behave on camera, and our article on online meetings covers the technical side.

When you are asked to speak without warning: the PREP structure

If someone at a meeting suddenly says, “Why don’t you share your view too?”, the PREP structure helps:

P (Point). State your main point in one sentence.
R (Reason). Explain why you think so.
E (Example). Give one concrete example or experience.
P (Point again). Return to your main point and finish.

For example: “I think it would be better to hold the classes on Saturday mornings. That’s because parents are busy on weekdays. Last time, more people came to the Saturday event. So I suggest Saturday mornings.” Do not be embarrassed to pause for a second or two to gather your thoughts.

Example: Zuhra speaks at a mahalla meeting

Zuhra is a schoolteacher (a fictional example). At a mahalla meeting she wants to propose a free Saturday reading club for children. She has been given 3 minutes.

Preparation. Zuhra thinks about her audience: parents, older residents and mahalla activists. They want to know: “Is it useful for my child, when and where is it, and what do you need from me?” She writes her goal in one sentence: “Parents sign their children up for the club, and two or three people volunteer to help.”

Structure.

Opening (about half a minute): a question — “Do you remember the last time your child read a book on their own, by choice, without a phone?”
First point: what the club is — an hour of reading and discussing books every Saturday morning in a room at the mahalla’s guzar.
Second point: the benefits for children — a reading habit, better speaking skills and time with friends. Here she tells a short story: how one pupil in her class became more active in lessons after a book discussion (without naming him).
Third point: how it works — taking part is free, the books come from the school library, and two or three parent volunteers are needed as helpers.
Conclusion and call to action: “The sign-up list is on the mahalla chair’s desk. Please put your children’s names down, and if you can help, come and talk to me after the meeting.”

Practice. Zuhra puts the speech on four cue cards, records herself on her phone twice and sees that she ran over time on the first attempt. She cuts the extra detail from the second point. In the evening she runs through the speech once more in front of her husband.

On the day. She arrives early, checks where she will stand and does a few rounds of four-count breathing before she speaks. When one father asks, “Who is responsible for the children’s safety?”, Zuhra answers honestly: “At every session there will be me and at least one parent. I’ll confirm any additional requirements with the mahalla chair and report back at the next meeting.”

Common mistakes, a practice plan and a checklist

Common mistakes

Starting with an apology. Saying “I’m not a good speaker, sorry” invites the audience to doubt you too. Go straight into your topic.
Trying to say everything. Three strong points beat ten weak ones.
Reading from the page. You lose eye contact and a lively tone.
Running over time. It is disrespectful to the audience and to the speakers after you.
Unchecked figures or facts. Information that starts with “I heard that…” weakens your speech.
Speaking fast with no pauses. Listeners do not have time to catch your point.
Ending without a call to action. Instead of “Well, that’s it”, state your conclusion and the next step.
Speaking without practice. A speech never said out loud sounds fine in your head but very different in the room.

A two-week practice plan

Set aside 15–20 minutes every day.

Week 1: the basics.

Day 1: choose a situation in which you may have to speak in the coming month and write down answers to the three questions about your audience.
Day 2: learn four-count breathing; record yourself on your phone for one minute and count your filler words.
Day 3: write three different openings — a question, a short story and a real fact.
Day 4: write your three main points, the conclusion and the call to action.
Day 5: prepare one story that lasts a minute (hero, problem, action, result).
Day 6: transfer your speech onto cue cards.
Day 7: deliver the whole speech in front of a mirror with a timer.

Week 2: getting ready to speak.

Day 8: record a video on your phone, watch it with the sound off and assess your body language.
Day 9: work on pauses — mark where to stop before important sentences.
Day 10: write down three questions you expect and prepare answers.
Day 11: use PREP to speak for a minute on each of three random topics.
Day 12: give your speech in front of a friend or family member and ask for feedback.
Day 13: fix the weak spots; if you are speaking online, test your camera and microphone.
Day 14: final rehearsal, at the venue if possible.

Checklist

It is clear who the audience is and what they should do after the speech.
The opening grabs attention, and the first two sentences are memorised.
Three main points, each with an example or piece of evidence.
There is a conclusion and a concrete call to action.
All figures and facts have been checked.
Cue cards are ready and numbered.
The speech has been said out loud at least twice with a timer.
Answers to expected questions and honest “I don’t know” phrases are ready.
The venue, microphone or camera have been checked in advance.
A breathing exercise and some water before you speak.

Public speaking gets easier with every talk. Start with small situations — a one-minute view at a meeting, a short toast at a family celebration — and improve one thing each time. If you would like to develop communication and professional skills systematically, take a look at our association’s free training programmes. When you are ready, submit an application and our specialists will get in touch.